I remember being a kid and seeing my cousin playfully wrestle with his dad, my uncle. This would cause me to sneak off to the bathroom where I would quietly cry. I always wanted that kind of relationship with my father.
However, my father was either out of my life completely (i.e. over +10 years) or he would randomly appear to be unapologetic for his distance, anger, and emotional abuse. I’ve worked my whole life to forgive him. It hasn’t been easy and only recently have I actually had the desire to want to forgive him.
You probably also have someone you’re reluctant to forgive. Maybe it’s a parent, a family member, a friend, a teacher, or somebody else. Maybe your parent wasn’t always as supportive as you’d like, or maybe your friend wasn’t always the best friend. You relied on them and they didn’t come through. You’ve been hurt and you’re having a problem forgiving them.
C.S. Lewis once said, “Everyone thinks forgiveness is a lovely idea until he has something to forgive.” We all love to talk about the beauty of forgiving people, yet this talk loses its beauty when we have something to forgive. It’s easy to talk about, but it’s hard to do.
Monty Williams had to take up the difficult task of forgiving someone who took the life of his wife. Monty’s wife, Ingrid, was struck by a car moving at 92 miles per/hour in a 40-mph zone. The driver, who died on impact, was high on meth, as well. Forgiving the driver would seem like a seemingly impossible task for most people, but not for Monty.
Monty Williams gave a eulogy at his wife’s funeral, which addresses how his relationship with Jesus makes him able to openly forgive the driver and endure this tragedy.
Ecclesiastes 7:2 says, “Better to spend your time at funerals than at parties.” Funerals are a powerful reminder that all our lives on earth will soon come to an end, which should motivate us to strive to live a better life, a life for Jesus.
This seven minute video inspired me to be truly forgive my father and forgive all the other hard to forgive people in my life. I pray it has the same effect on you.
“It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of everyone; the living should take this to heart” – Ecclesiastes 7:2